Sometimes we are tested by what we DON'T have

I remember, not so long ago, watching one of my spiritual father's cry during his preach as he had broken away from his sermon notes and was speaking from the heart about the many family events, anniversaries and his kids' birthdays that he had missed over the years while he was travelling apostolically into the nations. Some in the room shared his tears, the ones who did were the ones who knew what he was feeling, the ones who had shared in counting the cost, the cost of the work of the gospel. I remember hearing another preacher, I think it was Brian Heasley from the 24/7 prayer movement in Ibiza, saying that the testing we are often faced with is not merely the testing of the desire for material things but rather the desire to have what some one else has, that's covetousness. Coveting another man's wife, another man's house, his life or his ministry, whatever it is, we are faced with seeing what someone else has, and we are left desiring it. The temptation is even stronger when what we see in another's life is something we have desired for a long time for our own lives, perhaps even something we have prayed and stood in faith for. Stronger yet is this temptation to covet when we have counted the desire as part of the cost we have paid as we have considered ourselves going about the King's business. For example, we may have always wanted to travel but have spent our money on apostolic trips rather than on going to holiday destinations, or perhaps we have given up a career to follow the call of Christ and as a result have had to delay certain desires such as having children until the time, or finances, are right and things are more settled. I must be honest, I am not usually faced with this feeling, but today I am, well sort of. I don't feel covetousness over what I have seen in the past 24 hours, but I do find myself faced with the option to travel down this road, which I know to be depressing.
I won't travel that road, not today, or any other. FOR I AM ABOUT THE KINGS BUSINESS. His timing is perfect, and He will make a way in His perfect time. He has us in His hands. He has the blueprint for our lives. The questions I am left pondering then are of a healthier nature, I hope. How long till we see Your promise coming to life Lord? Your promise over our lives, family, ministry. For as we go forward we will continue to count the cost, we will try to follow Your timing as best we can, but please, PLEASE don't allow us to miss out on things in our life that You have for us. Lead us not to sacrifice things that You are not asking us to sacrifice. Help us not to give up the blessing You have purposed for us. As we sacrifice this earthly economy to build into our spiritual savings account, help us not to discount the wonderful life that you have also purposed for us to have on this earth. All Lord, in Your time. Your time.

Transferred Authority

Over the past few days I've read and meditated on the book of Jude as well as 1 John. Jude is so relevant to the modern day church it is scary! Almost as if written yesterday it addresses the issue of false prophets, false teaching "with swelling words, flattering people to gain advantage" (v16), and an attitude of grumbling and complaining, walking according to the lusts of the flesh. I don't want to be the one Jude is describing here! The solution... verse 20,21... build yourself up by praying in the Holy Spirit, keep on loving God and sharing that love, and stay focused on Jesus who gives us eternal life.

1 John also deals with deceptions of the last days but focuses on the issue of sin in the lives of believers, overcoming it, and living holy lives. As I've written before, I believe strongly that a holy life is the very foundation for sharing in the privilege of carrying God's manifest presence. As with Jude, 1 John also highlights the importance of loving God and living in community which outworks love with each other.

Of course these are the briefest of summaries, but in my quest to carry His presence I come to understand once again the need for holy living, the importance of love and by extension compassion, and our need for total dependence on the Holy Spirit.

Over the past 3 days I have felt a strong pull of the Holy Spirit to just be with Him in my devotional time. To allow Him to fill me, but more than that to just simply BE present and allow Him to be present to me. He is doing something and I feel that I am about to get to know Him! Perhaps something that many believers never do.

I found myself praying this:
Holy Spirit, come and take control. Become all encompassing of my life, become BIG over my life. I don't want to administer You, I want You to have the freedom to do whatever You want in, through, around and all over my life. The authority I have in this earth, which is the authority the Father created me to carry through His design in Adam, the very authority You need to operate through, is the authority I now give to You. I place it back in your hands. As opposed to me operating and making some space for You to move, I choose for You to operate and make space for me to be used if needed. I choose not to administer You, but for You to administer me, You steer this ship. Thank You!